Friday, March 22, 2013

I'll believe it when I see it.

We are scheduled to get 7 inches of snow starting late tonight.  So far every blizzard/ large snow storm that has been predicted and called for this season has either missed us, or just didn't produce more than an inch or two.  And as the title goes, I'll believe it when I see it.  We will be dutifully ready with plows mounted and shovels and ice melt stocked, because that is what do every time Pinky.  Try and take over the world of snow removal.  

This morning was the start of Calla's Spring Break.  Both her and India celebrated by getting up a 1/2 an hour earlier then they normally do when I have to drag them out to get ready for school.  WTF, sleep in, enjoy it.  Somebody needs to besides this lazy piece of work.
When Dave gets up, Rusty moves out of my crotch to Dave's side of the bed, and promptly falls right back asleep.  El Dipshito Dingito must have had a rough night last night, because he was seriously passed out.  All I remember last night is he was pissed I wouldn't spoon him with his head on my pillow, so he went sulking off to the living room.  Only for me to to wake up this morning to him curled up in ball in my crotch.  Between having kids and this damn dog, I honestly can't remember the last good night of sleep I have had.  

Speaking of crotches, after I dropped off India at school and Calla with my Dad, I had a 1/2 hr before the inspector was due at our house to sign off on the foundation before they pour the concrete on Monday, (you know Monday, Easter week, possible 7-10 inches of snow?) so I went running along the river.  Well, as best I could in windy damp feeling air for 2.5 mi.    
The only problem was I kept having the worst camel toe, and I just couldn't get warm.  1/2 hr isn't that long and towards the end I was starting to get warm, but my pants were pissing me off.  But as I plugged and chugged along I kept thinking to myself, "no one is out on the trail to see your lady bits,  just keep running."  Ok, lets get real, not running but jogging here since I couldn't get warm enough to get fast enough to actually run.  I felt like I was running through that sticky bubble gum crap they made those people on the Biggest Looser run through this year.  I did see 1 eagle, it was a nice flat trail, and I actually got out and burned some calories this morning, so I can only complain too much.  But damn it was just hard.  I know some days are like that.  Since I have no ballet class tomorrow, and loads of laundry to do, I am glad I was able to get something accomplished.  

Well, I hope your weekend is a good one.  I also hope you get lots of sleep and there isn't a dipshit dingo dog tucked up in your crotch for 6 hrs at a time.  And now since I have officially mentioned the word crotch more times in this post than one should in any conversation, I'll be on my way.  


Wednesday, March 20, 2013

Life vs. Giselle

Had a meeting this morning with the incredible Rocket Jones, about our new website.  I am completely overwhelmed, but in a good way.  This thing is going to be the bomb and bring us into the year 2013 for sure.  But at this point, the work is on me to get the content and pictures in there.  YIKES!

It is also on me to manage our landscaping and maintenance clients, my children (both small girls and employee, ) do the daily office dance with accounting and such, and manage our family household.  Pretty sure they would like clean clothes and something other than Cheerios for dinner.  FYI, I like mine with unsweetened almond coconut milk and a large spoon.  Thank goodness the house addition is at a point where I am not the one setting concrete forms, and it is in someone else's hands for right now.  We are scheduled to get a rain/snow storm this weekend.  I'll believe it when I see it, but I am pretty much the only person in Northern Colorado that doesn't want it to precipitate in some form this weekend.  I know it is selfish and we need it so bad, and fires in the area have already started, but with an over excavated hole cut too close to our foundation (not getting into this now) we kind of need to pour those walls this week!

It is times like this I really wish I could check out for a bit.  Actually hand Dave the bottle of milk and box of Cheerios, tell him dinner is on him, and head to ballet tonight.  Ballet and any exercise in general tends to clear my head and give me the clarity I need to focus and get my stuff done.  I stumbled upon a blogger the other day, Melissa who is doing an amazing job balancing life and ballet.  Girl just ran a marathon too!  It gave me some perspective and made me sit up and realize that this year isn't going to get any slower, so I need to find that healthy balance of work, being a mommy, house building, ballet and any exercise (even a video) I can get. So this evening I am going regroup and take the time and actually write out a day to day schedule instead of just flying by the seat of my pants. Who knows, maybe I'll stick to it for longer than a week.

In the meantime, because it is Spring Break at the studio and I can't head to class even if I wanted to, let's enjoy some "old school" Giselle pictures shall we.  A trip down memory lane for sure.  Thanks to the amazing Greg Hughes for letting me steal some of these as usual.

Peasants with empty baskets 
Mazurka anyone?
Gus and I about to get our peasant pas on
Hauntingly scary bitches we were
My dear friend, the gorgeous Kary

Wednesday, March 13, 2013

There's a hole in the ground Dear Liza Dear Liza

Just wanted to show you sneak peak of what I have to deal with around here these days.  Believe me I am not complaining, but man oh man lets just say having the laundry folded and put away, and a clean house are a thing of Christmas past and present.

There's a hole in the ground with no green grass growing round and round.

I am able to report no dead things were found during the "Big Dig."  Sorry, but it is probably for the best.  Lest we have a Poltergeist situation, and have to bring in the big guns up from the Springs to deal with an old Indian or any animal burial ground for that matter.  Still not sure what went through there.  It could have been an old well, leach field etc. ????  I am just glad it is done.  

Let's just say there were times when they came really close to the house.

Really Really Close!

And of course as soon as you disturb said ground, you will summon and awaken the weather Gods and it will snow.

And we all know what snow turns into when it melts...........

Mud mud and more mud.  Only about 1/3 of a big ass pile of dirt.

Any one need dirt?  We got plenty.

The blue hose is our temporary water line.  Water now tastes like a plastic hose and the pressure wasn't what it used to be, but I am told it is still better then most folks have in town.  See that tiny clay colored hole in the center of the back wall?  Yeah, we found snakes in there.  Alive and pissed because Spring just came early for their hibernation spot.  

See that other clay colored tiny spot down next to Dave?  That's Rusty.  He went ripshitzing around the corner today to chase some bikers and lost 1 leg and almost the rest of him down the side of the wall.  This picture was taken before they finished digging and there was still a way out.  Anyone want to take bets who falls in first?  Rusty, India, Me?

Building materials arrived and are everywhere.

And in the midst of building, the daily operations are still transpiring as usual.  Why we didn't start this last August is beyond me.

We have bitchy spoiled chickens who now demand (very loudly I might add,) to eat hand steeped oats and barley.  Or as my good friend who brews the beer, calls them.  Los Pollos Borrachos.  The drunk chickens.  It isn't fermented, but don't tell them that.  We'll just call it the placebo effect.

Yup...... damn bagel still there.

And to close, we have a fine example of a Dipshit Dingo Dog who doesn't have any boundaries.  Whatsoever.  He has come to the realization that if he sits on Dave's desk that he might be able see out the window.  Homeboy is still too short.  So he just sits there and barks anyway.  At the wall......

Rusty - "You talkin' to me?" *Said with best De Niro Guido accent.*

Rusty - "Are ya feelin' lucky, punk?"  "Go ahead, make my day!"  *Said with best Clint Eastwood accent.*
Me - "Get off the damn desk and let me get back to work!"

Adios Muchachos.

Friday, March 8, 2013

This ISH just got real!

Came home today from running errands to find this parked next to my house.

Just to give you some perspective, This is my tiny house next to the very large backhoe loader thing a ma bob.  My inner 10 yr. old boy dies laughing inside every time I say the word backhoe.  

And to give you some more perspective of how ginormous this thing is, this is a Dipshit Dingo Dog on top of the thingamajig.  

Sit Ubu sit!  Good dog.  :)  I swear I want to name a dog Ubu one of these days, just to see if anyone gets it.  I decided yesterday after watching some cartoon of India's, I am going to name the next batch of chickens after pastries and breads.  Preferably those made with lots of eggs and butter.  The yellow ones shall be called Challah, and Brioche.  I will get another funky one like Birdie and name it Pan Perdu.  Mmmm Pan Perdu.  Git in ma belly!

Well then.... moving on.  With snow coming in this weekend to the tune of 1 ft. - 1 ft. 1/2, I guess I know I have the ability to dig myself out for Calla's birthday party on Sunday if need be.  Too bad we couldn't talk her into having a Bob the Builder party.  I could have decorated around the track hoe, (no better of a name by the way,) and used it for picture opportunities.  Everyone could have gotten a hard hat, and taken rides in our skid steer.  Damn, that is an unfortunate Pinterest party opportunity missed.  Although we all know it would have turned out more like a Duck Dynasty or Honey Boo Boo episode vs. a pretty party idea found on Pinterest.  Who wouldn't have wanted to play horseshoes with toilet seats?  Besides, I could have finally had an excuse to make the white trash tater tot recipe I have hiding somewhere. 

Alas, Calla is a little girl turning 7 instead of a little boy turning 3.  So crafts and cookie decorating, with a side of sledding it is.  Since I knew we would most likely have snow and a 9ft. deep hole in the ground x 800 sq. ft., we opted for having it at my parents house.  This way we didn't need any liability waivers to be signed before dropping your kid off, so your kid doesn't accidentally fall in my hole.  In the meantime, if you come a knocking, you best bring yourself a hard hat.  Ooohhh, I wonder if they make them in pink???  Maybe Calla and her friends can bedazzle me one with rhinestones this weekend as part of their craft projects.  

And for my Mother who is most likely stuck in an airport somewhere in CA trying to get on a plane home before they shut the airport tomorrow, a promised picture.  

For those of you who have school age kids, there is nothing more precious then watching your kids perform.  For those of you who don't, don't worry I don't like watching other people's kids perform.  Heck, I don't like most other people's kids.  There are a couple these days I adore, and I am slowly becoming more tolerant in my old age.  

Calla is the midget in the center with her jazz hands high in the air wearing a hot pink polka dot dress with sunglasses on her head.  Front row for shorties like us of course.  So stinking cute. 

Afterwards we took her to get frozen yogurt with her cousins for a job well done and ran into her good friend and her sister.  It was a happy coincidence on a cold night, but she was super excited.  India just wanted to be at the big girl table to soak it all in.  

Back next week with birthday pictures if we aren't buried alive in snow.  We might need to get Dave some Red Bull cocktails in order to stay awake at the party after plowing all night.  Too bad we don't live in a resort town where everyone could go skiing and boarding.  Wait, that probably has a liability form to go along with it too.  Never mind.  Bowling it is next year.  

Happy Friday.  Stay safe my friends.  

Wednesday, March 6, 2013

What the truck?

Well, the poop truck is back.

The effin field is almost completely covered in black gold.  ie. compost.  Everything just stinks.  The dipshit dingo dog is obviously not phased by this anymore.  He has moved on to better things like harassing me while I am working by standing on Dave's desk across from me.

And in general being a lazy overqualified unemployed animal.

The porta potty and the trusses for the addition arrived.  I'll spare you a pic of the porta potty.  CDOT finally let the truck down from Cheyenne, WY.  I guess when it is snowing or the roads are wet, they won't let any oversized vehicles travel on the road and cross the border.  Good to know they don't like any commercial vehicles including me.  Dave was gone, so therefore it was up to me to "receive" the order.   Not sure how much checking over the order I did considering they are custom made and I didn't exactly get out a measuring tape.  Besides remember I am not the brightest bulb on the geometry tree.

It was also up to me to determine where they were going.  Who wants to play how and where can we shove an oversized semi on Cara's property?

Made it through the front gates.  If you notice, all of the chickens are out in their yard wondering what the hell is going on.

Made it through the second set of gates into the corral.  Barely.

Naturally I made him back it in somewhere.  Couldn't just make it simple and drop it in a straight forward manner.  Besides this way they are out of the way of all of my trucks and trailers so no one accidentally drives over them when they are buried under a supposed ft. of snow this weekend.

After backing forward and back 30 times to line up next to the garden fence, they unstrapped the trusses.  The next step was to tilt the long bed, pull forward like a bat out of hell, and just dumped the damn things right there on the ground.

And........within 1 inch from the gas tank on the underside of one of my work trucks.  :)  Well I tried to move it, but the battery was dead.  So the trusses actually hit the inside of the back dually tire sliding off, but then bounced forward.  Good thing I made sure the truck in park because if it had been in neutral it would have shot through the gate down to the lower corral.  I had hoped for them to be a bit closer to the garden on the other side of that fence, but beggars can't be choosers and they are far enough over that they are out of the way until we need them.  I'm not moving them, and everyone is Happy Happy Happy.

Tonight we are headed to a musical performance at Calla's school.  They are supposed to dress for an underwater / beach theme.  Not sure who's idea this was in March, but as you can see that there is still snow on the ground.  The options in her closet are an aerial mermaid costume, or a tank top sundress with a large flip flop on it.  We are going with the sundress, but even I drew the line against flip flops.

Don't worry I'll take pictures.



Monday, March 4, 2013

Goats and Girls

Take 6" of snow earlier this week and add in 60 degree temps this weekend, and you have a recipe for a muddy sunshine filled mess.

We started the day Saturday by playing outside and soaking in the sunshine on the play set before ballet.  After ballet we helped some dear friends and neighbors do some spring cleaning.

To sweeten the pot, their goats had just had babies.  Like 2 days ago old.  Since I put the picture on FB people have asked if those are my goats.  As much as I love goats, I believe I have struck a happy medium with myself.  I get to cuddle them for as long as I want, but then at the end of the day I get to give them back and let someone else raise them and deal with the poop.  Brilliant.  It works fabulous with livestock and other people's new born babies too.  Cause I don't know nutin' bout birthin' goat babies.  Not to mention watching them nurse really hard on their mothers quickly snaps you right back to reality and makes my boobs tingle just thinking about it.  

But damn those babies are cute.  The goats too.  ;)

Peek a boo!  I see you.  You can't hide from me little brown goat.

Come back!  I just want to play.  Ok, I really want to hug you and kiss you and love you forever.

Maybe if I jump they will jump?

Enough about the goats.  On Sunday we celebrated our annual America Girl shopping and lunch out for Calla's birthday.  Baby girl will be 7 and yes, I am crying inside.  Pretty sure the damn doll now has a better wardrobe then me and a much more exciting life as well.  We survived the masses at the mall, and everyone came away with something fun.  The weather was so pretty at 65 and sunny.  Almost forgot it was March.

And as I sit here and type this, the weather is back to 38 degrees with 30 mile an hour wind gusts, and about 1/2 " of snow on the ground.  So basically anything that dried out over the weekend in the glorious balmy spring weather will be right back to its muddy mess in a day or two.  Dave celebrated the weather by heading to Vail at 5 am to jump off a snow covered cliff on skis, and I am supposed to be typing up maintenance contracts.  But seriously, I am pretty sure no one around here wants to even think about mowing grass right now.  We'll just work on those later.  After all, tomorrow is another day Scarlett.  

Friday, March 1, 2013

Pole Dancing

HAHA! Gotcha.  You wish.  If you think I am the one pole dancing you are sadly mistaken.  I will probably get some hits from Russia for that title.  Seriously, no one wants to see that.  That would be ummm.....awkward to say the least.  Not that coordinated, and besides the only pole I want to dance with these days is a cinnamon churro stick from Taco Johns.  Yum!