Tuesday, July 31, 2012

Here piggy piggy

How was y'alls weekend?

We went to a pig roast.
pic courtesy of maui marriott

No, not that kind of a pig roast.  I wish!

When I was about 13 and we were having a huge hole dug in our backyard in Texas for our swimming pool, my Grandmother asked the construction crew if they could leave the hole open long enough for her to roast a pig before they poured the shell.  She was pretty damn excited about having a 7 ft. deep hole in the backyard.  Needless to say that didn't happen.  We were in Ft. Worth suburbia and not on Guam, and that deep of a hole was a bit over kill.

Chamorros are pretty damn passionate about their pig.  Fast forward to a family reunion in California.  Let's say circa 1998.  Picture rice pots lining the counters and a big fat pig smack dab in the center of the kitchen.  I watched at least 5 relatives fight over who would get the tail and ears, and super crispy skin.  Um....?????

Let's just say we tend to do things a bit different here in Colorado on the Plains then they do in Guam. 

Pigs out here are cooked on a homemade spit made from leftover machine parts.  Pretty clever huh!

This little piggy didn't come from the market, he/she??? (Sorry little piggy RIP) came from the Auction, and happily lived until that morning.  

Looking surprisingly clean for cooking a huge pig all day.

They set up a parachute and invited lots of family and friends.

The Hostess with the mostest!  (on the right.)

Confused Haole children wearing leis and sun hats. 

Pig's nose whiskey was consumed by all.  

The happy Host gave 4 wheeler rides, while children zip lined off into the sunset. (see left of pic.)  Figured I'd explain that in case you were wondering.

Goats jumped on jumped on the trampoline when the children were done.

Traded the whiskey for a beer and some kids as the evening went on.

Fun and merriment was had by all.  Some of us more than others!

Hey Honey....I am pretty sure taking a picture while looking up from a hammock has got to be the worst angle ever!  It makes friends look like they are 7 ft. tall and makes me look like I am 50 lbs. heavier and a huge lush.  

Oh well!  Thanks for a super fun time Todd and Jess!  Can't wait to do it again next year!

Thursday, July 26, 2012

Anthropologie meets Kitchen Cousins

How about a house post.  Haven't done one of those in a while.  As a matter of fact, I haven't done anything for a while.  Tonight I will be dragging my hot lazy sloth self to Company class tonight because

A. I can feel my butt getting wider by the minute.

(Lucille's beignets for breakfast with Eggs Jennifer i.e.. eggs bennie with avocado and spinach. yum!!!)


B. I have to take Calla anyway, so I might as well just stay and put some of those neglected leotards to good use.

So do you know who the Kitchen Cousins are?


In short they are 2 hot guys who remodel kitchens and have a show on HGTV.

A couple of weeks ago Dave and I were watching tv in the same room before bed.  (Shocker!)  Their show came on and they remodeled this kitchen in an East Coast Brownstone.  You are probably wondering what a farmhouse in Colorado has to do with a Brownstone in NY?  Nothing, except they did this cool thing with the all knobs in the kitchen.  They made them all different.  Dave basically thought this was fantastic.  Here's how the conversation went down:

Dave: That looks cool, we should do that here.
Me: Um, what hang antlers in the kitchen?
Dave: No, switch out all of the knobs.
Me: Oooh, that's cool.  We totally should.
Dave: Where do you suppose they got all of those knobs?
Me: Anthropologie.....(wheels churning in my head)
Dave: You should go get some.
Me: Excuse me, did you just tell me to go shopping at Anthropologie?
Dave: Yup.
Me: (no words because I fell off the bed)

Never has Dave said carte blanche...Sure, just go pick some stuff up at Anthropologie like it is Wally World and we are out of toilet paper.  This is the man who gets frustrated when I come home with a can of Febreeze, or something in a shopping bag that cost over $20.  By the way, nothing that comes home in a shopping bag is ever over $20.  Patagonia jacket....picked it up for $20.  Pillows from Home Goods $20 a piece.  New king sized bedspread....Can you believe it was on clearance for only $20.  Right.....Shhhh.  ;)

Anyway, so while my sister was visiting, we trekked our happy butts to Anthro in search of knobs.  We found them, and some other things may or may not have been purchased at Anthro for $20 as well, and I am not talking a dish towels or measuring cups here.

We also found some cool ones at World Market for cheap too.  

Here they are all ready to be installed.  Best part is every single one is different.

Installing was not as easy as expected, because some of the holes needed to be drilled bigger, countersunk, and then the extra length sawed off.  Why the damn drill needs a light brighter then my car is beyond me.  It looks like WAL-E ready to attack.

Final result and some of my favorites

The overall look is very subtle and you don't really notice it as you walk in unless you look straight at them getting something out of the cabinet. Whimsical really, and not too kitschy.

We can't do the pulls on the drawers as easily because they are already drilled at a set width with our existing bin pulls.  But if I can find them, we will.

If anything it gives me an excuse to go back and go shopping at Anthropologie.  With $20 only of course:)  Duh!


Tuesday, July 24, 2012

Cowboys and Chobani

Well, we survived Cheyenne Frontier Days and Zac Brown Band.  Why they can't do it in March is beyond me.  I had on shorts and was bloody hot.  Not sure how the cowboys do it in long sleeves and jeans all damn day.  It can't be because they are acclimated to it, because Dave works outside all day and even he was hot in shorts.  Cowboys are just crazy.   

If you are friends with me on Facebook, well then you may have seen this rare and lovely picture of the two of us.  Yes, I wore the hat, and the belt buckle with flip flops.  Sacrilegious I know, but I would have never gotten f'n boots off my feet at the end of the night.  Between the beer and the corn dog ( yes I know we need to work on my diet right now,)  I could have just seen my drunk ass falling off the end of the bed at 1 am trying to pull the damn boots off my sweaty swollen feet.  By the way, I did refrain from eating a funnel cake because I had the corn dog.  Priorities people.  I figured since the hot dog was cooked I was safe.  I was starving and sugar just didn't sound good in the heat.  Fair food scares me, especially that giant turkey leg.    

So last night just as we were getting the girls ready for bed, a huge gale storm gust of winds came through and knocked the power out.  I really wasn't in the mood to play Little House on the Prairie.  And I don't mean Charles and Caroline Ingalls pretend to make another baby in the dark farmhouse. We don't have ac, so the cooler wind was actually welcome, but it freaked the girls out a bit.  

Instead of sitting around in the dark, we lit some candles.  Except the only ones I could find were not hand dipped beeswax like our good friends the Ingalls, but were citronella, or super smelly.  Seeing as we are more Nellie then Laura, super smelly won.  Yankee Candle "Dune Grass" in the living room, and Bath and Body Works "Lemon Mint" in the bedroom.  You did have to pee in the dark, because I was out of candles.  There's rustic for you.  

Also, when you are in the dark without the distractions of House Hunters and Mega Builders in the background, it is pretty much guaranteed that you will have talk to your significant other that time of the night because there is nothing else to do.  Therefore it wasn't any surprise when Dave and I started fighting about what time we should start digging out coolers or transfer the mass amounts of Noosa and Chobani yogurt we had sitting in the fridge to the deep freeze downstairs.  The deep freeze couldn't hold everything, but there is enough ice build up in there to create a giant cooler out of it.  The coolers had more space, but we didn't have enough ice.  

I could live with the eggs and ketchup sitting out, but with a carton of Noosa at damn near $2.50 a piece and the Chobani not much better, I wasn't about to loose the 25 or so cartons of yogurt we had in the fridge.  Vive la Chobani!!!   We eat an obnoxious amount of yogurt, and yes......Dave and I can fight about pretty much anything.   Serious or stupid.  

At some point he gave up and left to go up the road to see who still had power.  Evidently this is a popular thing to do in my neck of the woods when the power is out, because we saw more traffic and people on the road at 10 pm then at 6 pm.  It was like cruising at the local Sonic, minus the cherry limeades, tots, and classic cars.  I didn't bother calling the Rural Electric Company because this wasn't our first Rodeo. Hah! Rodeo, get it?  I know the neighbors had already called and bugged them at least 3-4 times each.  It is just how they roll.  

In the meantime, Calla was still restless, so we did what any pioneer kid would do..... shopped for new apps on the i phone. What.....like you expected us to sit around in a drum circle singing Kumbaya, and discussing our feelings while toasting marshmallows over the gas stove?  Hell to the no!  I couldn't get "Moaning Myrtle," ie. India, asleep fast enough.  We had already read some books, and she really needed to go to bed.  Because I could turn the wireless off on the phone, we could look at games involving alligators who pitch a fit if you don't get them water out of a clogged sewer just to take her mind off the storm for a few minutes.  

After she was asleep, and Dave was still out cruising for utility boom trucks and milkshakes, I busted out the Kindle and started to read.  Because reading 50 Shades of Grey part "Menage a Trois" is probably something you "should" do in the dark.  If only Caroline Ingalls knew what she was missing. I am willing to bet she probably wouldn't be darning socks either after reading about Christian Grey and his "Room."  

I am happy to report the power did come back on after a couple of hours, and we went back to our normally scheduled programming.  In separate rooms.  :)      

-Anyone have any favorite things they like to do when the lights go out?  
-Favorite food from Sonic or flavor of Chobani?  (Cherry limeades and passion fruit yogurt for me for sure!)   

Friday, July 20, 2012

Ya know I like my chicken fried.......

Cold beer on a Friday night

via google

A pair of jeans that fits just right 

And the radio up!

Feel the touch of a precious child

And know a Mother's Love 

(They be goin' to Nene and Papa's for tonight!)  Thanks Mom and Dad!

Off to channel my inner "Buckle Bunny"

Dave and I are headed up to Chy town to "The Daddy Of Them All"

Thursday, July 19, 2012

Yoga mats and a handicapped chicken

Happy Thursday!

Ok, maybe not so happy.  My children are currently tattling and bickering with each other.  The Dipshit Dingo Dog is pestering Mattie, and the chickens are literally picking at each other.

Yes picking.  Chicken Mole' has something wrong with her leg and is limping.  We can't figure out if it is her toe or her actual leg.  I am not about to crate up the damn chicken and schlep her over to CSU to have them charge me $100 to tell me my $3 chicken has a broken toe that can't be fixed just like people.  She seems to be eating and drinking just fine, but in the pecking order world she is lagging behind.  Therefore she is getting picked on.  So we have quarantined her in the coop away from the others with food and water in hopes that her poor head will quit getting, well...... picked on.

Yes, I have a chicken in my bathroom, and no, the tile has not been replaced and is going on 6 mo. living in the mudroom.  Don't judge.  After a round of peroxide and neosporin, she appears to be doing better, and not look like she got into a wicked cock fight.

Typical day.  Yup.  I feel like throwing in the towel and heading to the lake.  Alas, I am trying my hardest to finish up a landscaping plan, (ok, only trying so hard seeing as I am whining and writing instead.)

Everyday day stresses although minor, add up.  I carry an obnoxious amount of that tension in my shoulders.  I of course figured this out because I couldn't lift my arms yesterday.  Tell you why in a second.

I also learned via Pinterest last night  (the new Web MD when it comes to diagnosing and fixing your maladies,) that the reason I have a sway back bubble butt, and poochy gut is because my hip flexors are too tight.  Brilliant!  Nope, has absolutely nothing to do with the fact that I possibly could have binged on a rack of ribs and amaretto apples from Famous Dave's, my sodium level is probably out the roof from eating pickles causing me to retain 12 lbs. of water, or genetically that the women in my family have a gut and bubble butt.  Oh yeah, let's not forget about those 2 c-sections that separated my abdominal muscles.  Naw........it's just my hip flexors being too tight.

Back to the reason I couldn't lift my arms.  I took a Yoga class, and I enjoyed it.  Holy crap, the angels are singing.  A friend of mine and teacher at the ballet company is getting her yoga teacher certification and needed some guinea pigs to teach a practice class to.  Now I have taken yoga classes before so I wasn't clueless.  And let us not forget that I am someone who runs around town in yoga clothes looking like I just took a 2 hr Bikram class.  But is actually just a lazy poser who hasn't showered for 2 days and is snatching cookies not kale for her kids in Whole Foods while wearing stretchy black pants, a headband, and flip flops.  (I also tend to do this with running apparel too.)  I don't like yoga.  I do ballet, I take Pilates, I jog slowly, I ride the elliptical to the moon and back.  I don't do yoga.

I even own a really cute yoga mat.  Which was happy I am sure, to have the Velveeta scraped off of it, and put to its intended use vs. its current use as a roof for a fort in the kids bedroom.  I got my mat from a friend of mine who owns a store in town here: www.primabodywear.com.

It is from the Boulder Mat Company.  www.thebouldermatcompany.com  Super thick, and the turtle is cute.  No that is not me.  Let's get real here people.

But this class was different for many reasons.  It was taught by someone who is good teacher, and was at my ballet studio.  I was amongst friends in a familiar setting.  So if I fell over no one would judge, or care.  I could relax and focus on what I was doing properly instead of worrying about how much of an idiot I must look like.

I have had classes before where the teacher is more interested in showing off really hard poses that are so impossible no one except Inspector Gadget can attempt.  Go Go Gadget leg.  Or are so damn slow and boring that by the time the class is over my ADD has kicked into full force, and I have mentally meal planned for a month and written my entire grocery list in my head, alphabetized it, and organized it by aisle number.  Every once in a while I catch myself chanting "Ohm" in the cereal aisle.  This class wasn't any of those things.  Nor was it in a hot box.  I don't do hot anything unless there is a large body of water, pina colada, or slot machine involved.

What..... it is not like I am picky or something.  

So there you go.  I got a good workout, relaxed my shoulders a bit, and even stretched my hip flexors.  Maybe tomorrow I can actually get my pants buttoned because my gut and butt will be tucked into place.  Truthfully though, we all know I'll just put on some stretchy yoga pants instead.  Now that this post is way longer then intended, I am off to witness the damage my kids have done to the living room.  Because Lord only knows what they have done with the yoga mat now.    


Thursday, July 12, 2012

Late as usual and a hooker to boot

Today is the 12th of July.  So it only seems fitting to show you some photos from the 4th of July and the week before.

The sister came for a visit and brought the kids.  All three of them if you include "everyone's fun uncle" too.  They played for hours, dropped, munched and played for hours more.

Weddings were attended.  And while I don't have any good pictures of the wedding reception because it was too dark for my phone, my phone managed to capture a hooker at the gas station on the way home late that evening just fine.  Complete with a gold lame top, cha cha shoes, and a fat pimp in a Honda Civic.  Too much fun for us to handle considering we weren't even in Denver but 15 miles from home:)

Some serious shopping was done as well.  Not for hookers, but everything else under the sun.  Good friends came for a visit too, and may have helped contribute to the shopping.

Birthdays were celebrated, and cake was devoured by those wet, dry, and missing teeth.

The 4th came and brought a seafood boil, and lots of food, good friends, and alcoholic drinks in a bag.  See that sign?  When we dug it out of the well house, we realized the little chalkboard signs still had all of the food labelled that we served for our wedding.  Lemon risotto, pork filletino, tiramisu.  YUM!  It was kind of sad to erase, but Calla had no issues, and wasn't sentimental in the least bit once she had the chalk and a wet rag in her hand.

The large Jenga set was made finally.  See the stack in the background?  Nobody's toes were broken.

Slip and slides were conquered, and 2 babies were snuggled with.  My ovaries may have ached for a short minute and then I gave the babies back, once they started screaming because they realize I didn't have any magic boobies.

See.... I looked festive.  Hot, sweaty, drunk, and festive.  Thanks to Liz for the pictures I stole off her Facebook page without permission. :)  

To end the week we had another BBQ.  My mom wanted to make sure she captured all of us before everyone went their separate ways.  Let me introduce the whole fam damily.

My parents, and all of the kids who were instructed to remove all fingers from noses just a second before.  My cute sister, and her husband, aka "everyone's favorite uncle."  Those of us who are in dire need of a root job and no plans to take care of it anytime soon.  And the husband who with his tattoos and sunglasses looks like he is ready to rob the gas station just outside of town where we found the hooker.  Merry Christmas love the Smith Martin Doyles.

Just for fun, we made the uncle who is way way more qualified then me because he actually does it for a living, take a picture of us.  He calls this the cover shot.  Better then a mug shot.  The sunglasses came off, and my hair went up, which may or may not have made the roots look worse.  It is pretty sad I have no current "family" photos of the 4 of us.  I have a great one at a wedding in Idaho before India was born on my desk, but that's about it.  The school kept asking for India to bring in a current family photo for their wall, and sadly we didn't have one.  I'll take the blame for that since I hate being in pictures.  But looky here folks, no less then 3 pictures of me in this post.  A miracle I tell ya.

That's about it for now.  Gotta go put on my landscape architect hat today.